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"No" is such a simple word....
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only two letters. Yet saying "No" out loud is harder for most people than saying, "I'll be glad to..." (eleven letters)or "When do you need me to..." (seventeen letters)
Most of us said, "No!" quite well when ... Views:34800
1.) Ask yourself, “What’s the worst that could happen?” Too often, we place excess importance on potential problems. We all have a certain amount of energy so let’s apply it to creating extraordinary relationships, advancing our careers and meeting our goals INSTEAD of wasting that energy ... Views:33609
Tell me if this sounds familiar -- someone asks you to do something that you really don’t want to do or you honestly don’t have time for. It might be a church bake sale, a school fundraiser, participating on a committee, or even just working late. But you feel like you will let the other person ... Views:27154
If you are soft-spoken, how do you think others judge you? Do you think they regard you as being confident, assertive, and self-assured? If you are concerned about the image you project, then your soft-spoken voice is definitely not projecting those qualities. Instead, your lack of volume is ... Views:23099
Everyone who is destined to succeed in life will at some time be the subject of mockery or criticism. If you are now facing this type of abuse from people, either in your personal circle or at work, it’s valuable insight to know exactly why it’s happening so you can deal with it ... Views:21624
Want to try the laundry pickup, delivery service? Is a professional country where men and women alike spend lots of amount of time in offices, to create ends meets. Adding home chores such laundry, cleaning to their already tight schedule is stressful, and a really tall order.
If you ... Views:18177
"Never be bullied into silence. Never allow yourself to be made a victim. Accept no ones definition of your life. Define yourself."
~Harvey Fierstein ~
Why do you allow people to talk to you like that?
Is there a sign on your forehead that gives people permission to talk to you in an ... Views:16322
One of the biggest confusions which rest in most peoples’ minds is that they can not understand the fine line of difference between assertiveness and aggressiveness. According to my experience, assertiveness comes from supreme self-confidence, knowledge about the subject and overall ...One of ... Views:14361
What do you think you are worth? Do you think you deserve to be treated fairly? Do you believe that other people deserve to be treated better than you do?
Actually…………….We all possess the same basic rights! Many people seem to have forgotten or may have never been told that these basic ... Views:13714
“You must do the thing that you fear until the fear of that thing becomes no more.”
- Brian Tracy
One day, not too long ago, I was in the middle of a 5 day fast. I was looking for spiritual answers to some situations that I was facing. On the third day, I got hit with the truth. ... Views:12293
In my travels across North America speaking on motivation and human potential I hear the same question asked repeatedly, " How can I become more assertive?" There is no doubt about it, there are people in our lives who are harmful to our health and we don't like it one bit.
I read recently ... Views:11162
Why Do Bullies Bully?
by
Bill Cottringer
“Courage is fire, and bullying is smoke.” ~Benjamin Disraeli.
I am beginning to think that a very widespread problem today, especially with youth, is the problem of perceiving you are being bullied (by life, parents, teachers, peers, employers, ... Views:10599
One of my family members recently emailed me to ask me this question. It's a question I've been asked many times over the years. It's usually asked by people who are just beginning to assert themselves.
My family member provided the details of her particular dilemma. She is having a ... Views:9844
One of the most important skills we can learn that will help us manage and fulfill our priorities is to say "No." Once we get there, it becomes easier and easier, but initially it can be extremely awkward and unpopular with others. Knowing the stages we’ll go through can help us realize that ... Views:9429
One of the biggest obstacles that we *all* have to face from time to time is dealing with Confrontation”
And most of us can’t stand it!!
Fact is, you’re not going to be able to ‘win’ every time …and some people are so stubborn that they’ll argue till they’re blue in the face – even when ... Views:9240
Giving and Receiving Compliments
Deflecting compliments is a well strengthened reflex for a surprising number of people. Someone speaks kind of us and we brush it off, change the subject or fail to find the truth in what has been said. Inability to receive a compliment mirrors our own ... Views:8727
The Art of Selfishness
Achieving a harmonious balance between your work responsibilities and your personal life requires that you become selfish. That’s right, selfish. Stop frowning and wipe that look of disbelief from your face. Let’s look at this concept in more detail by examining the ... Views:8436
It’s not the easiest thing to be assertive with friends. They may be used to you doing everything they ask. If you agree to any request they make, cancel appointments to be with them, and even ignore things you have to do so you can do what they want, then you’re like a doormat. You don’t ... Views:7770
Sound familiar?
“When I buy the new car; I will be happy.”
“I can’t wait to meet the man of my dreams; when I get married I am going to be so happy.”
“I can’t take this anymore; when I lose weight I am going to look awesome!”
The philosophy of BE-DO-HAVE, which some say was first ... Views:7639
Have you have ever loaned money to a friend or family member when you really didn’t want to because you felt you had to? Then, here is some timely advice for you: Never feel that you must surrender when it comes to making a decision about whether or not to loan your money. There are ways for ... Views:7480
Conflicts are normal in all relationships, even loving ones. It’s vital that these differences are resolved. If not, the feelings between you and your partner will gradually diminish.
Different personality types handle conflicts in different ways, and the way they argue depends on their ... Views:7415
Has anyone ever spoken to you in an inappropriate manner? Often people are caught off guard and are not prepared to handle these challenging situations. But, as a leader, whenever you are in a situation that’s uncomfortable, it’s imperative that you speak up; the person needs to know that the ... Views:7410
A QUESTION IS ASKED...IS AN ANSWER REQUIRED?
When a question is posed to most of us, we feel compelled to answer it. It is as if a question is actually a demand that an answer be given.
We are trapped. We MUST answer.
No, no, no. You ALWAYS have a choice.
In a story in Winnie the Pooh, ... Views:7243
You are looking at your bank statement, and you realize that you’ve been getting the same salary for a long time. You know that you’ve added a lot of value to your company or organization, and you feel you’re entitled to a raise. Last week, your mechanic told you that your car needs a major ... Views:7135
Have you ever had a situation where you want another person to change their behavior, and you ended up arguing with them instead? There may have been yelling, put-downs and anger. This certainly isn’t the best way to get others to act in a different way.
One of the best ways to get others ... Views:7072
Lie detection may start with watching for signs of lying in a person. But sometimes you have to do more than just listen and watch. Sometimes you have to trap a liar. Here is one of the many ways to do that.
Lie Detection - Introduce An Assumption
This is a common trapping technique. Here is ... Views:6994
Marketing is the full description of all steps and procedures required to lead to sales. These steps are particularly aimed at ensuring that what is delivered to the consumer satisfies consumer requirements with a profit. Marketing objectives and targets must be continually evaluated, ... Views:6856
I am the victim of a hovering parent. At times, it seems that almost nothing I do is right according to my mother. My decision-making is questioned in regards to my parenting skills, my relationships and even how I keep my home. She means well but she can be a bit overbearing at times. I used to ... Views:6801
Passive people give away their passivity with the type of language they use. Their words tell others that they don’t think very highly of themselves and that they need others’ approval. This type of language takes away their power.
De-emphasizers are methods of using speech so that passive ... Views:6798
Does your work environment bring out the best in you or the worst?
When you leave work, do you feel drained, exhausted and even angry? Do you generally feel like you are dodging bullets all day?
It happened to me the other day. As a practicing RN, I take shifts at a local, acute care ... Views:6727
In order to be as effective as possible with your confident statements, you need to learn how to hold your body and use your voice. If you’re saying confident words, but your body or voice show that you’re unsure of yourself, people will believe your nonverbal communication instead of your ... Views:6584
You're the new secretary and your boss asks you to become a Notary Public. He then walks back into his office and you can hear him on the phone talking about a contract he wants out of, and the fact that he's going to falsify a date and signature -- "No problem, my secretary will do it."
It ... Views:6544
Anger is a normal part of life. However, if it gets out of control, it can really damage your family, your work, the people around you, and your lifestyle. If you are easily irritated and get angry over minor problems, it is important to learn how to curb the excessive energy that this emotion ... Views:6438
This article is a transcript of a talk with a male student. It starts with a discussion of an exercise he has been given and then expands into the subject of the intellectual and emotional centers, feelings and thoughts. He is very shy and lacks self confidence. He has been given the exercise of ... Views:6297
As a spiritual coach, my job is to show clients how cause and effect plays into their life. Many people do not understand that their actions or lack of action can create an ongoing cycle of the same situation repeating over and over until it is dealt with. People often believe that they can just ... Views:6077
Speaking up in meetings is crucial if you want to be promoted at work. People will see you as being smart, energetic, and sharp. Your inner confidence will help you express yourself, and the respect others will have for you will add to your confidence even further.
The Problem
Picture ... Views:5970
Why do I have so much trouble confronting people?
Oh, get over it. No, I'm just kidding. While we seem to return to temperament over and over again, it is true that outgoing cholerics (see FAQs on Temperament and Personality) and critical melancholies find it easier to confront than ... Views:5909
Learning how to become an extrovert can be a daunting task. And if you're anything like me, just being told to "get off the couch" and "get out more" doesn't quite seem to cut it.
So I'm here to offer some tips and strategies you can implement into your life immediately to get some more ... Views:5867
Anger is a natural emotion, but often times, people don't express anger. Anger has a way of expressing itself on its own. Letting anger express itself like this is unhealthy and can have negative consequences.
A person who lets his anger express out of control will tell you how draining it is ... Views:5855
Literature review is an in depth analysis of the previous research accredited by scholars and researchers which is usually the part of an introduction to an essay, report or thesis.When conducting literature review ,you are required to do a review on the work established by the scholars while ... Views:5595
Informative speech papers are papers that are written to aid the delivery of information to an audience. Writing informative speech requires one to give only facts about the discussion topic. This is a bit different from persuasive speech which usually incorporates views of the writer. The aim ... Views:5239
Boundaries are the invisible lines that separate you from me. Boundaries are limits we set for ourselves to keep us emotionally, physically, and spiritually safe. Sad to say, but many people don't know anything about boundaries because it's not something learned in school and is rarely talked ... Views:5224
There are some people who seem to carry the weight of the world on their shoulders. In some shape or form, they are always there for others. And whether they truly want to be there for others is not always irrelevant; it often appears as though they have no choice in the matter.
For some ... Views:5194
Anger provoking events are all around us; like stress it is in the perception of each individual as to how one responds. When you get angry, it is beacause an event has provoked your anger. Everyday events such as these are anger provoking in the moment or because it has reminded you of a ... Views:5079
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The best habit to watch Prime ... Views:5078
Stop Apologizing and Start Living. That's right. I have recently become aware of an interesting phenomenon - many of us apologize all the time. It might be an apology where you actually say "I'm Sorry", but it might be much more subtle. It is a way that we silently apologize for who we are, as ... Views:5054
Many employees complain about the way their supervisors communicate. There are two extremes I hear about constantly. One extreme is a supervisor who is overbearing and makes unrealistic demands of their staff and the other extreme is a supervisor who is inactive and doesn’t know how to take ... Views:5052
"Assertiveness"- If you visit a bookstore and try to search books on Assertiveness, chances are that you would be a little disappointed. Though the behavioral school of thought has recognized the importance of Assertiveness as a behavioral trait, still there is some confusion and mystery glued ... Views:4921
If I said that everyone lies and deceives a bit, would you agree? Well, it’s true, believe me! There are five ways to detect that people are lying.
1. How you feel.
Firstly, trust your gut feelings. All of us are hard-wired to detect danger and deceit. This survival mechanism is largely ... Views:4919
If you are in a supervisory role at work and you have men in your department it is important to learn how to communicate with them. It is widely known that men and women communicate differently and a woman supervisor who understands this and works towards communicating more effectively will get ... Views:4848