Thriving Vs. Merely Surviving

The quick definition of thriving is to flourish and prosper. My teaching interests have shifted considerably over the years, until my full attention is on uncovering and discovering what it takes to amass enough personal power so that thriving is the outcome, no matter what curve life decides to throw.

The journey to the land of thriving starts with a decision to leave the well traveled, rocky and potholed road called “Life is hard and then you die”.

You cannot get to thriving by this route because you will be too exhausted from having to hyper-vigilantly navigate around the many problems that consistently show up to derail your trip. An incompetent technician with an obsession with the color red programmed the traffic signals on this road. As a result, most of your time is spent stopped, waiting for the light to turn green.

At first, you dutifully sit there with your motor idling until your realize that the amount of time that the signal flashes green and you are free to move forward, is a rare event. On this road, your choices are limited to either staying stopped or nervously and with great trepidation, running the ever-present red light and fervently hoping you won’t get caught.

Since so many travel this road their entire life, it is easy to assume that there is no other way out if you are going to drive yourself.

Of course, everyone has heard of the stunt drivers, the race car drivers and the chauffeured rich and famous who travel on different paths, but most assume that the option to thrive is only available to those special others, and that certainly isn’t you.

I am here to let you in on an important secret. The land of thriving is within walking distance of where you are presently living. You don’t even need a car unless you want to take a leisurely sightseeing tour around the thriving village just to become more familiar with the pleasures of thriving.

Here are the specific directions that will position you to thrive. First, stop exactly where you are. Take a sensory inventory of everything that surrounds you. Make a list of what you don’t like about your life. Make another list of what you do like. Next make a wish list that includes everything, big and small, which you would want to have happen if you had a magic wand and, through no effort or striving on your part, these experiences would be given to you.

Now answer this question: “What are you most disappointed about presently? Be specific. What do you most dislike about this disappointing aspect of your life? What do you most like about this disappointment?

You are now ready to receive the key to the city of Thriving. It is this. When you make your life decisions based upon what you like and try to avoid at all costs what you don’t like to experience, you end up stuck with a life that endlessly disappoints you.

Why? Because life moves rapidly from one new moment to the next. Each moment is brand new and one of a kind. When you insist on commanding and demanding life to give you experiences that you like and refuse to deal directly with, acknowledge, or accept anything you don’t like, you stop your life. You become disconnected and detoured from the life you were meant to live.

Decide today to acknowledge what you like and what you don’t like and then move past your disappointments. Decide to adopt new decision-making criteria. Ask yourself these three questions.

Given where I am right now, what is the highest and best action I can take? Once you have received this answer, move to the next question. Can I do this? Even if you are mad, sad, or scared. Next, will I do this? Activate your willingness. With both of these questions, only a yes or a no is acceptable.

If your answer is no, you can’t, and no, you won’t, it isn’t time for you to move forward. Increase your self-nurturing until you can extricate yourself from the drama and you feel safer and more secure. If you answer yes, you can, but no, you won’t, take action, look for who or what you are resenting and rebelling against. Forgive yourself and forgive whoever you need to so that you can take back your power to choose.

If you answer yes, I can, and yes, I will, it is time to take action. Do what is in front of you and trust that your next steps will appear when it is time.

Stop lusting after far-reaching outcomes. Stand up on both legs, prepared to engage your emotions and your intellect, as you face forward. Ask for help from your intuitive guidance by being open and receptive to your highest good.

Take ownership of your considerable personal power by taking one action step forward. Lighten up. Let the sun break through the clouds of struggle and strife and activate your power to set in place the intention to thrive.