Speaking From Your Feminine Power

Talking sweet is about finding your "sugar" even if you're not happy and want to discuss a problem with your man. This is about speaking your power and speaking from your feminine.

Using words describing your feelings in order to say what does not feel good to your man is how you talk sweet.

The power in this is to express what doesn’t feel good while still keeping the connection between you and your man undisturbed (i.e., not pushing him away or leaning forward).

It's a good idea to sit down before hand and write out your feelings so you have a script to speak from. Scripting is when we write out the feeling messages we’re going to say to a man when we have a particular conversation with him.

It’s important to process your feelings when you’re writing a script . . . and you want to deal with your TRUE feelings. You want to be authentic. You want to find the words for the feelings that you feel underneath your thoughts.

This is where creativity and being poetic play a big role in Feminine Power.

I invite you to make a list of words that describe your feelings and that feel natural to you when you say them. Oh, and sometimes you’ve got to practice saying something a few times (in the mirror) before it feels “natural.”

Now that you have your feelings down on paper we are going to address the “problem” you want to discuss with him.

So image a scenario where you’re really upset with your man for something he didn't do.

You want to talk to him, but instead of your usual approach, this time you"re going to use feeling messages, so that you’re speaking from your feminine power. Feeling messages generally start off with "I feel," "I felt," "It would feel," or "I'm feeling."

Start off your first feeling message by speaking a good feeling to him first (like, "I feel so good sitting here with you right now").

Now let’s address the not so good feelings.

Try this:

“I’m feeling a little torn right now. I feel so good being here with you, and I’m still feeling ignored. Is now a good time to talk about it?”(Notice, you’re not characterizing the issue, you’re describing your feelings!)

If he says “No,” then you ask "when is a good time for us to sit down and talk about it?”

If he says “yes, let’s talk about it now,” then remember to:

1. Stay in your feelings in the moment (and not in your head);

2. Speak your feelings rather than the facts;

3. Give context about what you’re talking about (make it brief and sweet);

4. Stick to the Don’t Do List; and

5. Stay open, inviting and warm – don’t shut down.

Now that we've played out this scenario, put together your feeling messages and write them down into your script.