My Wife Resents Me: Dealing with Resentful Wife

Resentment is a very difficult emotion and it's not something you ever want to touch your marriage. It's difficult enough to sustain a loving and committed bond without resentment taking hold of the connection. If your wife is feeling some resentment towards you because of your past or current behavior , you may feel it's wise to just let it slide. Unfortunately, this is not something that is going to evaporate into the vapor just because you wish for it to. You must address the issue that is at the crux of the problem so your wife can allow the resentment she feels towards you to fade away. Once that happens, your marriage will be on the forward track it needs to be.

Do you have a clear idea of why your wife resents you? This may seem like an obvious question but unfortunately it's something that many men struggle to understand. At times it can almost feel as though there are two different views of everything that happens between a couple. The wife sees and feels things from her vantage point while the husband absorbs things much differently. Unless your wife has clearly defined what is causing her to resent you, it's nothing but a guessing game for you to try and figure it out. You may believe that it's the one time you commented on her weight a year ago when it's actually all about the fact that you didn't remember to bring her flowers on her birthday. Obviously, her feelings of bitterness may have been born from a much more serious issue. You can't possibly know what is behind what she's experiencing unless you ask her.

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It's important that you approach your wife from a place of clarity and calmness. Demanding to know why she resents you is only going to magnify the negativity that she's already experiencing. You'll fare much better if you arrange a quiet evening for the two of you to talk. Don't expand on what you'd like to discuss with her. You just want her to get the impression that you're putting some forethought and planning into this. That will help her understand that it has significant meaning to you.

Explain to her that your marriage is the most important thing in your life and that you cherish it as well as your connection to her. Bring up the fact that you've been feeling that there's some discontent on her part and that you understand why that might be. It's good to mention anything that you may have done that you know has irked her or bothered her in some sense. It may be the fact that you've been putting in extra hours at the office or perhaps you've just taken too much of a liking to the sofa on Sunday afternoons and you've zoned her out during the big football game.

If your wife feels that you're recognizing some of your shortcomings, she'll feel better about talking about what is causing her feelings of resentment. This isn't going to be an easy discussion for either of you but it's essential for the long term health of your marriage . You do need to remain compassionate and understanding throughout as that will help her open up more so she can share exactly what she's feeling.

Once you two have been able to pinpoint the source of her resentment, you can then work towards removing it from your marriage. Although you may disagree with her about what she feels you have done to cause her to feel the resentment, try and find a common ground to work towards. Apologize if it's appropriate, compromise and look towards a brighter future together.

Your willingness to handle this issue head-on with charm and maturity will help your wife let go of the resentment as well. Your role as her husband is one you should take seriously and that includes respecting what she's feeling and helping her find a more positive outlook to focus on.

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If you think that you can force your ex to walk back into your arms then that could prove to be a very costly mistake.

You need to initiate steps that will make her attracted to you again so that she happily rushes back into your waiting arms.

Make her want youInstead of appearing before her face at every corner, make sure that you vanish for a couple of weeks before appearing on the scene only on rare occasions.

This will transform the hate within her into worry and she will now start missing your presence in her life.

Present an upgraded package before herInstead of looking pale and depressed, which in turn will repel your ex like a child before a dentist, make sure that you present an upgraded package to catch the eye of your ex again.

You should develop a positive attitude towards life, get suited up in smart clothes and ensure that your hair is styled or gelled to perfection so as to attract her towards you again.

Psych her into your lifeIn addition to physical looks, you will also need to pull her in mentally towards yourself.

You should apologize in person if you have erred since this will certainly melt your ex's heart.

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Show her that you still care for herYou can also help her out in a selfless manner. This will impress her and also show her that you still care about her.

However, do not wait in a corner ready top rush in at her command. Instead, ensure that she calls you up for help before stepping in. This will enable you to retain your self-esteem and build up respect in her heart.

Remember those important datesEven though she might have broken up with you, make sure to wish her on her birthday while also remembering other important dates.

This will please her tremendously as well as indicate that you are trying from your end to connect to her.

Do not enter the dating ring
Although you might be tempted to use jealousy as a way of getting her back into your life again, remember that girls are different than guys.

You need to indicate to her that you have not yet started dating even though you might be pursued by other girls trying to take advantage of your single status. This move will impress her even as it creates feelings of desire within her.

Carry on with your lifeYou should now carry on with your life since you have done all that needs to be done.

The ball is firmly in your ex's court and if she has been sufficiently impressed by your attitude and your revised looks then she will surely make that move within a short time.

These steps will require dedication and concentration in the face of depression but if you manage to put them in place then your ex will surely get attracted to you again and rush back into your aching arms.

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Every relationship has its challenges. Since all is not always well, one needs to be receptive to the signals that can grow out of proportion and harm a relationship. If you feel that your relationship is hitting a rocky patch then here are the things that you need to do to keep your relationship form breaking up.

Look out for the warning signals
Have your radars up for the warning signals that show that all is not well in a relationship. Bitterness, jealousy, disrespect, lack of intimacy etc all show that there is some problem brewing between the couple. The moment you sense these things happening to your relationship, you should try to find a solution.

Admit to the problems
Just having a problem and looking at it in the passing is not enough. You have to admit that you have a problem and try to figure out why you have that problem. Sometimes one needs to look beyond the problem to get to the cause. For example, your lack of intimacy could be because of some unresolved issue. Try to separate the cause from the consequence.

Don't go cribbing to friends
So you have a fight, your relationship is not all rosy...you head to your friends and have a good gossip session verbally bashing your man/woman. Your friends also see how bad your partner is and add fuel to fire. You end up feeling more miserable and wonder why you are in this relationship. You cannot save your relationship when you have negative thoughts clouding your judgment. Don't take advice from friends, no matter how close you are.

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Don't fight publiclyKeep your fights private. Never wash your dirty linen in public as that just makes both the people in the relationship feel small, petty and very embarrassed. It also damages the relationship further.

Don't use past confessions as ammunitionJust because you are having a fight doesn't give you the right to use past confessions or fights to be used as material to 'win' this fight. Be fair when you fight if you want to save your relationship.

Head to a counselorIf you feel that you are not able to resolve things by talking then you must head to a counselor. A counselor will help you see things clearly and will help you realize your mistakes.

Be honest and try hard
Be honest to your relationship and work hard to make it work. Follow the instructions of your counselor, don't despise each other and have faith in yourself, your partner and your relationship and you will be able to save it.

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Will my ex want me back? This is a question that all people who want to get back together with their ex ask themselves. The truth is that no matter how amicable or how bad your break up was no ex readily agrees to get back together. So to get your ex back you have to be prepared to work hard to make them "want" to get back with you.

Don't jump the gunMost people make a mistake in the first stages of the break up. They get all desperate and try to convince their ex that they shouldn't break up. That just makes the ex's resolve even firmer. Your ex can't stand the sight of you at the moment so walk off with the little bit of your dignity that is still left.

Take ownership and responsibilityBefore you make your exit talk to your ex and tell him/her that you take full ownership of your mistakes and take responsibility of all that went wrong in the relationship. Your maturity at handling this situation is only going to make your ex feel better and hate you less.

Give your ex some spaceAfter this give your ex some more time off. Your ex needs to need you a little in his/her life and that will only be possible if you leave on a good note. Be patient at this stage as temptation to get back with your ex is quite high.

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Make one really good apologyOnce again resurface and instead of apologizing a thousand times and looking all pathetic you need to make one really good apology. Cover all the details that you feel need to be addressed and show your ex that you have made the required changes. But don't push your ex even once to get back together with you.

Don't even "think" of making your ex jealousA lot of people feel that by making your ex jealous you can make them insecure enough and get then to come back into your life That never happens and cements the ex's belief that they made the right decision by leaving you.

Communicate with his/her friends and family
During your lull period keep in touch with your ex's family and friends who know you. Remain in their good books . Never look like you are promoting yourself but always say that you wish your ex well and only want him/her to be happy.

Tell your ex you want to get back eventually
Your ex will hear of your feelings and good behavior and will be alright being friends with you. Once you both get comfortable with each other broach the topic of a possible reconciliation. Your ex will take a little time but will eventually get back with you.

Saying or doing the wrong thing can actually cause your spouse to feel even more distant from you. You can make your spouse fall back in love with you , all over again.

You don't have to worry about whether your spouse is on the brink of asking you for a divorce. You can control the situation and use specific techniques to naturally make them fall hopelessly in love with you.