It's practically impossible to go through life without being hurt by somebody. Most of us humans have a hard time letting go of such injuries and carry these scars of pain, resentment and anger with us for months, years, or even a lifetime.
Forgiveness can be a difficult concept to understand. I often hear, "If I forgive her, then she got away with what they did". Or, “Forgiving him would mean I accept what he did to me.” My response to this: “So, not to forgive is like taking the poison (continuing to suffer for what they did or didn’t do to you) and expecting them to die!”
In reality, forgiveness is not letting the person of the hook for what they did or didn’t do, it’s releasing the barbed hook that continues to cause you pain and suffering so your wound can heal. Forgiveness is one of the greatest acts of self love you can do.
Think about it…Anger, resentment and pain take a lot of energy. When there’s more energy going out than coming in, you are operating from an energy deficit. This sets you up for depression , disease, and/or chronic physical pain. If you are continuing to harbor “ill feelings” towards someone, who are you really hurting? YOU! So, I ask you, is this person worth all this energy you continue to give them?
Now you might be asking, “OK, I understand that forgiveness is something I do for me and my own healing, but how do I go about forgiving someone if all if feel is anger and pain when I think about this person? The Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT) is a perfect tool to use to get you to a place of forgiveness .
EFT can collapse the energy disruptions that trigger the emotional toxins when tuned into the hurtful event. When you no longer feel angry and resentful, you can gain objectivity and emotional distance from the event. This clarity will often lead you to a new perspective. Mostly pain begets pain. Whenever you have been the one who has been the source of pain for someone else, it is because you were in pain, right? When you recognize the person who hurt you must have been hurting terribly themselves, forgiveness comes much easier.
Forrest Samnik, founder of LifeWorks Counseling & Coaching, has dedicated her career to helping people through life's challenges. A psychotherapist, life coach, and retired Registered Nurse, Forrest has more than 30 years of experience in counseling and medicine. She has been practicing the Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT) since 2002 and was one of first practitioners in Florida to receive EFT certification. Forrest has had phenomenal success treating issues relating to trauma, depression, phobias, panic and stress disorders, low self-esteem, and relationship issues. She also provides EFT training to other mental health professionals through the Florida Department of Health.