Resilience is the ability of a person to adapt and recover whenever things do not go according to plan. A very important trait of a resilient person is his or her refusal to dwell on negativity and failures in his life. Resilient people acknowledge and face the situation they are in, learn from whatever mistakes they have made, and just move on with their lives.
A couple of research conducted by psychologists show that certain elements are very important to resilience. These are:
Challenge - A person who is resilient considers difficulties as a challenge, and not something that should be paralyzing. Resilient people think of their mistakes and failures as lessons in life they can learn from so they could grow as individuals. They refuse to make these negative events in their lives define who they are and what they are worth.
Commitment - Another important trait of resilient people is their commitment to reaching their goals. They always find a good reason to wake up in the morning. When we say commitment here, we don’t mean commitment to work only. Resilient people are committed to their values, personal beliefs and relationships with people.
Personal Control - A person who has resiliency is focused on the events and situations he or she has control over. These people don’t waste their time and energy on things they do not have any impact on. It is because of this that they gain more confidence and they feel more empowered. On the other hand, those who worry more on uncontrollable events end up feeling helpless, lost and powerless.
Permanence - Resilient people easily believe that the effects of any negative events in their lives are just temporary and never permanent. This way, they feel more hopeful that good things will happen eventually.
Pervasiveness - Setbacks or rejections are seen by resilient people as a sign that they need to improve on certain aspects of their lives. They don’t let such negative events affect the areas of their lives that have nothing to do with the rejection or failure.
Why Is It Important To Have A Resilient Mindset?
How we may succeed in life is greatly affected by how we view stress and adversity. This can pretty much explain why it is essential that we develop a resilient mindset.
Failure is inevitable, and in fact, we may find ourselves failing from time to time. We have to acknowledge the fact that we are bound to make mistakes and feel bad about ourselves. But this doesn’t mean it is justifiable that we stop taking risks! Instead of getting stuck and living in fear of failing again, we need to have the courage to chase our dreams and turn them into reality. By being resilient, we realize what lessons we must learn and how we can use this experience to become a better person. In short, resiliency allows us to recover from setbacks so that we may continue our quest for the kind of live we have always wanted.
How Do You Develop Resilience?
Fortunately, resilience is something you can learn and develop. In the process, though, it is vital that you have the urge and commitment to incorporate these into your day to day living:
- Sleep enough, do regular exercise , and handle stress appropriately. Facing and overcoming any challenges in your life become much easier when you have a healthy mind and body.
- Be consistently optimistic. When you let negative thoughts linger in your mind, you are also allowing your efforts to be derailed by such thoughts. What you should do is practice talking to yourself in a positive way. When things go wrong, do not dwell on your inability to produce positive outcomes. Instead, encourage yourself to perform better in the future so as to avoid making the same mistakes again.
- Learn to find good things in bad situations. Even if you thing the circumstances you are in cannot be any worse, try to find good lessons from that experience. Always think of failures as a reminder that you have many other things to learn and improve on. Make sure that you understand what you could have done wrong and what led you to making such a mistake.
- Choose how you will react to adversity. All of us go through discouragements and failures, but what makes great people different is how they react to their failures. Instead of blaming yourself or other people for what went wrong, stay composed and maintain perspective. There is no need to panic if you are not successful in something.
- Develop confidence in yourself. There is no way you could develop resiliency if you doubt your skills and capabilities. Know your values and stick to them in whatever decisions you make. This is an effective way of boosting your confidence and eventually, resiliency.
- Build relationships. You need to surround yourself with good people if you want to remain positive and resilient. It is going to be hard to focus on reaching your goals if there are people around you who want to take you down. This is why, in the workplace, having a mentor is crucial to a person’s career management. The kind of people you allow into your life plays an important role in how you overcome difficulties and eventually achieve success.
Cecile Peterkin is a certified career and retirement coach, and a registered member of the Career Professionals of Canada and the International Coach Federation. She is also the Founder and Senior Career Strategist at Cosmic Coaching Centre , provider of career and life management services for middle managers and mid-career professionals across Canada, United States and Europe.