When it comes to talking to someone, how we perceive them usually makes all of the difference. If another person is seen as a friend or someone that one has spoken to before, then it is going to make it easier for one to talk to them.
And this is part of being human, because although times have changed and we generally no longer have to worry about whether we will be eaten alive by another animal (depending on where one lives of course); our survival instincts are still as strong.
This is a good thing, as while one might not be eaten by an animal, it doesn’t mean that their own species are always going to have the best of intentions. So to know if another person is safe to be around or not is incredibly important.
One is going to come to these conclusions relatively quickly and through getting to know the other person; their ability to relax in their company should increase.
And as this happens, their perception of the other person is gradually going to change. This will make it easier for one to communicate to the other person. They will also no longer be seen as a stranger and as just another human.
But when it does come to strangers, one is not going to feel completely safe with them. This is a good thing and is in the interests of one’s survival. What it can get in the way of is when one wants to talk to people they don’t know or when they are talking to people they don’t know.
It is often a matter of context and where one is, that will define whether or not seeing people as strangers is a help or a hindrance. For how one sees others defines how they will behave and how they behave will then have an impact on how others see them and therefore how they will behave towards them.
This is the most important thing here; one feeling comfortable in themselves when it comes to being around others. Seeing another person as a potential friend is one way of bringing ones best side out.
When one is a social event or out socialising on a night out, their behaviour is going to have an impact on how other people respond to them. And if one views the people around them as strangers, they are unlikely to be as warm or friendly as they would be if they were surrounded by close friends or family .
Their facial expressions, body language and the words they use, as well as their non verbal communication, that is harder to control, will reveal this. And the people around them will respond accordingly.
A Different Outlook
Now, if one was to see people in situations such as these, as friends they haven’t yet met, their behaviour is going to radically change. And the people in these environments are going to pick up on these signals, it won’t mean that everyone warms to this, but then this is to be expected.
What it will mean it that there will be a stronger chance that one will make greater connections with people and who knows, some of these might become long terms friends , business partners or clients for instance.
If one has always seen other people as strangers or ’other people’ then to see them differently wont feel normal and might even feel uncomfortable. This new approach doesn’t have to be rushed, it can be done at a pace that one feels comfortable with.
And as time passes, this will soon become second nature and meeting new people will be a lot easier.
It will also be important for one to be discerning in who they do talk to and not to expect everyone to respond to them in a way that is friendly and welcoming. This doesn’t mean that one has to let this get them down or put them off from trying this approach
The first time that one does this, they are going to become clearer in how it feels and in what they need to work on, if anything. New ways of behaving can take time to become part of who one is, but before long, they will be just another way that one expresses themselves.
Prolific writer, thought leader and coach, Oliver JR Cooper hails from the United Kingdom. His insightful commentary and analysis covers all aspects of human transformation; love, partnership, self-love, and inner awareness. With several hundred in-depth articles highlighting human psychology and behavior, Oliver offers hope along with his sound advice. Current projects include "A Dialogue With The Heart" and "Communication Made Easy."
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