At this juncture of creating new footprints in the journey of life, I was well aware, more so than I’d ever been, of my defects of character. Awareness is wonderful, but I wanted change that would give me a much better life. I wanted my defects gone!
By this time, many things had changed in my life. I knew and had accepted that I was powerless over a number of things, including some mood altering substances and actions. I realized that a part of my life had been lived in moments of insanity. Most importantly, I came to realize I was not the centre of the universe, there was something both inside of me and all around me that called the shots, and that if I paid attention, this “higher power” could give me sanity and life direction if I allowed it and stayed out of my own way. I only had to control me!
I had taken an inventory, and found much good. I had become transparent to myself and another human being, and opened myself up to my higher power in admitting the wrongs I had done.
There are allegedly 7 deadly sins. In one form or another, I had found each of these, some more, some less, had played a role in my life. I had and still have defects of character. At this point in my life, I was WILLING to have my higher power remove them!
Guess what?
Even with my willingness, my defects did not disappear magically, they are a part of what makes me, me.
That being said, I asked my higher power to remove them right after I talked through my inventory. And I ask my higher power to remove my defects of character daily.
I am ready anytime my HP decides they should be totally gone. Who knows, one day that might happen!
What I do know, in being aware of my defects (like dishonestly, lust, sloth, etc.) and asking on a daily basis for help in dealing with them, their impact has diminished significantly over time. Many of the defects have not reared their ugly heads for extended periods of time. I do realize they still lurk under the surface, and my reprieve must be sought everyday to keep me aware!
I am work in progress, and I get enough feedback to appreciate the changes I’ve made. The problem is; this higher power that I strive for conscious contact with has enough trust in me that I have freedom of choice. Periodically I make a bad choice, its part of being human. But I am making better choices on a daily basis; I am making progress and will never reach perfection in the human form I’m in! But progress is great; it gives me a more abundant life, free from addictions and full of hope and serenity!
So, you want to get rid of your character defects?
I can’t promise you perfection, but I can coach/mentor you to improvements if you are willing to change. This, I know, is part of the life purpose that has been set out for me.