I have 3 cats.

Mystery who is a male has been around for several years. He is big strong sleek solid short haired black cat. He will not allow anyone to touch him. He stays outside and hunts, eats and positions himself to make a quick exit. This guy is a loner. He used to hiss at me, with my feeding him and acknowledging his space he’s quit hissing, yet there is no way he’d let me pick him up, much less pet him.

And I have two female cats – they reside (in the house) with me on behalf of my grandchildren. Each of my grandchildren wanted a cat and while it wasn’t a possibility for them to house a cat, my home was the next best choice. Isn’t that what being a grandma is all about?

Fluffy belongs to Bryce. Fluffy has sort of long straggly black and white hair; she was the runt of her litter. As a kitten, I used to feed her with an eyedropper and eventually she graduated to nursing a kitten baby bottle – she knows me as her surrogate mother. She has the personality of being needy. She used to drive me crazy; her demands for my attention were persistent. I would get annoyed with her until I realized some things – more about this later.

Pretty Princess belongs to Miss Chan. Pretty Princess is a big sleek solid white shorthaired cat. Her presence is strong, and assertive ; sometimes I admit she is a bit aggressive. She likes occasional attention – me talking to her and or being petted. Pretty Princess is easy to maintain. My oldest daughter brought her to me telling me that this cat desperately needed a home and would I consider taking her – and then Miss Chan caught wind and well, you know as they say the rest is history.

In my life I look for patterns and how those patterns reflect insight about myself. Two female cats, how might they reflect insight?

Fluffy represents those parts of my self that have been needy, wanting attention and being validated. She’s been adamant about me petting her, darting out in front of me while I walk, jumping on the bed and pawing on me with her claws open. Fluffy has tested me. I’ve done that too. I’ve tested my friend’s loyalty, wondering if they were really there or just saying what they thought I wanted to hear.

Now Pretty Princess brings a sparkle to my eye. I chuckle at her assertiveness . She takes care of herself quite nicely and is pleasant to be around. She’s busy outdoors and for the most part she seems to have a well-balanced life. Her claws come out with an occasional screech towards Fluffy, especially when I’m around. She wants to be territorial and more than once they’ve fought.

In the middle of the night I’ve been woken to screams of their fighting or to their threatening each other and right to the threshold of a fight – I’d be telling them to knock it off – sending each of them to their part of the house. There have been a couple of times that Pretty Princess has held Fluffy hostage to the inside of the litter pan and they both would be exchanging horrible screeches.

My mind would like to revisit being needy sometimes. It’s an old well- established habit. The healthy part of me says, that way of being is yuck! I not only don’t have the desire to repeat that, it’s a challenge for me to be around neediness for very long. There have been moments where one part of me has argued with the other – in fact I was up against myself, much like Pretty Princess holding Fluffy hostage in do do. I used to beat myself up, condemning those aspects of myself that I saw as weak.

In order to move beyond the aggressiveness and being needy I learned I would need to come to terms with accepting of all of me – the things I liked and those that I despised. It was and is the only way to experience inner peace .

Now I’ve seen remarkable growth in Fluffy and Pretty Princess. For that matter, I’ve experienced a lot of growth too.

Interesting how it appears right in front of me – in my cats. Oh the male cat – well, that’s another story.

Wishing you insightful moments and a wonderful week.

Smiles to you!Glenda

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