Think Different to Speak Different

You are well aware of the words you speak out loud to yourself, but perhaps even without uttering a word, you tell yourself a lot. Every word you speak and thought you have is absorbed in your subconscious mind and affects the emotional biochemicals released into your body. Positive words have a positive physical impact, but words can indeed hurt us physically!

For the next few days, observe how you speak to and about yourself—both out loud and in your mind. Pay particular attention to speech like:
• I can’t do...
• It’s impossible!
• I give up on…
• I’ll never…
• I am fat.
• I can’t do anything about it.
• I always fail at…
• It’s just no good…
This person is always better than me.
I would have done better if…wouldn’t have happened.
Write any negative self-talk you observe here:
Now that you have identified your negative self-talk, think about positive phrases you might use instead:
Evaluating How Others Speak to You
How you talk to yourself isn’t the only thing that impacts your body’s biochemicals—how others speak to you also has a big effect. People like your family, peers, coworkers, close friends, and casual acquaintances can all impact you.
For the next few days, observe how others speak to you. Pay particular attention to speech like:
• What is wrong with you?
• I know better than to ask you to…
• You never remember…
• You’re lying.
• You don’t support me.
• Why can’t you just…?
These thoughts can be spoken or unspoken—you may know on some level what someone else thinks of you without negative words being spoken out loud. Usually, this knowledge will correlate with how you feel about yourself when you are around that person.
When you notice a negative pattern of speech from a particular person, plan a course of action to change that pattern. Many people are unaware of how they sound to someone else, so it is important to take their intentions into consideration when you are deciding what to do. If that person is not integral to your life, think about distancing yourself from the person. If the person is integral, think about telling him or her how you feel about what they say to you. Email can be a valuable tool in expressing these kinds of feelings. In either case, consider using positive self-talk to counter the negative input. Write down your ideas...
Shape Your Experiences with Powerful Language
By now you’re beginning to see how the language you experience shapes your life, but you can also shape your experiences in life with powerful language! The very words you use to anticipate and describe something in your life change how you feel about that experience.
Write down some of the most difficult things about your life and the language you use to describe them. These might be a specific relationship, a material possession, a trait or action, even a task—like....
“My relationship with my spouse: frustrating, unfulfilling, one-sided” or “Paying the bills: tiresome, repetitive, depressing.”
Next, identify the happiest things about your life and the language you use to describe them. Perhaps you like your wardrobe because it is stylish and flattering. Or you like your work habits because you are efficient, organized, and competent. You may have very good intuition and social skills. Whatever your strengths, write them down....
Now, think about how you feel about approaching both the most difficult and the happiest things in your life. What is different about the things you list on your “difficult” list and those on your “happiest” list? Which would you rather focus on? Does the language you use to describe something shape your anticipation of that experience? It does! If you describe paying the bills as tiresome, you will no doubt dread paying them, and if you describe your wardrobe as stylish and flattering, you will no doubt look forward to dressing yourself.
You can begin to affect powerful change in your life just by changing the language you use to describe the difficult aspects of your life. Rewrite your difficult experiences by choosing language that focuses on the positive rewards you gain from those experiences. For example, “I am committed to paying the bills so that I can experience financial stability.”
Rewrite your life NOW !