Build Confidence by Overcoming your Fears

Fear can be the robber of our dreams if we don't learn to recognize it and then to work toward overcoming it.

Within each and every one of us is an element of Fear. There are genuine fears that our body will warn us about, there are previous experiences that have created a fear within us as part of our protective mechanism. Then there is the Fear that comes about when we are about to try something new, go somewhere different, learn a new skill or take on a course or line of study or change from a habit or area we are comfortable with to something different.

The feeling that we have in our body when these fears come about that tightness almost like a tight garment surrounding our body, sometimes teariness and even exhaustion.

The secret is in learning to use fear so it can benefit us: to protect us when needed and to overcome outdated or unwarranted fears, so as not to allow it to take control of our life, but for us to take control of it.

By learning to take control of our fears, we will also learn to take control of anxiety, panic and situations of stress. Because fear is the core foundation. Our level of self-confidence will improve, our levels of self-doubt will diminish becoming quietly confident and comfortable in our own skin.

When we make a conscious approach to overcoming our fears it is like turning on a light switch in our brain and suddenly things that we did not think could be achievable all of a sudden we seem to have a good shot at achieving. Just because we have started to put some action into these situations and have changed our thinking in believing that we can do something about this. Fear and anxiety is decreased by action, learning and taking on new challenges. Along with this confidence is built.

Remember that whenever you commence something new, something you have never done before or somewhere you have never been before there will always be an element of scariness, self-doubt and nervousness or anxiety. So acknowledge the Fear is it a warranted fear, that is if I follow through will this be harmful to me or someone else. By this I mean if you want to give up smoking, but become fearful that if you do that you may not cope. Where this may seem a warranted fear it possibly won’t happen and there are steps you could put into place for this not to happen. Such as the sounding board of a positive friend or take up yoga. The Fear that you could use here that would be warranted to give you support for giving up smoking could be that you want to give yourself every opportunity not to become ill or get cancer. It is these type of areas where you can use fear as a powerful tool.

So identify the fear then work out whether it is warranted or it is just because you think that you will not be able to manage the new experience. If it is something like taking on a new role at work then ask questions of others plus yourself. Then take the new experience one step at a time. If it is somewhere new where you are going or it is something difficult that you need to handle, then see if you can have a friend come along with you for support.

Think back to something very difficult that you have learnt and overcome. It may be driving a car, passing an exam, giving birth, climbing a roof and I am sure there are a lot more very difficult even scary situations that you have overcome. So you can use these as leverage to leap forward and to give yourself faith that you “Can Do it.”

•Taking Charge of the Fear

Take the feeling of anxiousness like it was a piece of meat you were going to cut up to eat. You would cut it into chunk sized pieces that were easy for you to chew then to eat. This is what we need to do, with our feelings of anxiety or fear. By doing this first of all we put the situation into a more manageable concept that allows us to focus with a positive attitude that will help us throughout the day to achieve the outcomes that we want from the fearful situation. By breaking things down into manageable chunks helps us to succeed even with what may seem the most difficult or overwhelming of tasks. With each step we accomplish comes improved confidence.

•Exercise to Reduce Fear and Anxiety

Exercise is better than any drug. It is a known mood booster, immune enhancer and helps with building once again our self-confidence because we feel better. Exercise is free and we can do it in the safety of our own environment. The best way to use exercise to boost confidence is by finding a workout you enjoy and can look forward to. That can be a home video on YouTube or a walk around the neighborhood with your friends or kids. Schedule your workout for 30 minutes to start, and focus on it only it terms of how you feel confidence wise. This exercise isn’t about weight loss, muscle mass, or what the scale says, it’s only about how you feel.

•Change your Self Talk

You know those thoughts that pop into your head. Yes they are your self-talk. Now the problem here is we believe these thoughts, so when we say change your thinking change your life, this is done by changing our self-talk. So our self-talk may be telling us that we are shy, lack confidence, you are stupid, insecure or inadequate. So what happens that you will mimic these thoughts and ideas! This brings about a falseness in your true ability and inner strength that you have been born with. So as we become focused on these negative perceptions of ourselves so we believe and continue to produce negativity in our lives. So liken this to fishing if you want to catch the right fish, you have to use the right bait. So if we want to attract uplifting people, events, experiences and life changes. We have to use the right bait and that bait is changing our self-talk. So I want you to the next time you catch yourself with a negative thought arising, change it into something positive. By changing the thought to something like I know I can handle this, I am a kind, loving person. There are many areas of our thinking that we need to change. This is something that I have done all of my life. Bringing into my conscious thinking, thoughts that are going to help me to feel happier, more confident, handle difficult situations better, and have better relationships. For support in changing these thought patterns make sure that you watch positive movies, read positive books and most of all mix with positive people. By positive I mean people, movies, books and events that look at solving problems not creating problems.

•Take Care of YOU

The best thing we can do for ourselves is to take care of ourselves. No one else can do this better. So getting up having a simple routine in the morning where by you shower, take care of your hair, moisturize your skin so that it feels alive and well. Put on some makeup if you are a woman, some nice perfume. Even if you have a work uniform if it is clean and fresh you will feel better. I have found over the years that even if I have woken up not feeling so crash hot, if I go through this routine it does make me feel better. You don’t have to go over the top, but just by taking these simple steps is a great way to walk out the door feeling you have put some effort already into your day.

•Become True to Yourself

This is about getting to know you, your inner most thoughts. What you value and how you want to be seen to the world. Your family, friends and most of all YOU!!!

Helpful Resources:

For Help with Strategies for Optimal Health, Beauty: Taking Care of Yourself from the inside out, get a copy of my EBook Optimal Health the Key to Ageless Aging: https://gumroad.com/l/VBmOF

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Empowering You to Optimal Health Julie Doherty N.D