Teach Your Kids to 'Report' not Tattle

Keeping good communication with your child is one of the best advice for parents. If you have open communication your child is more likely to feel comfortable in sharing important information with you. But does your child know the difference between tattling and reporting? Do you know the difference?

Tattling is defined as: to let out secrets. We've all seen it, one child will tell on another child to a grown up just to get the other child in trouble.

Reporting is defined as: an account of describing detailed information on an event. This means a child would tell an adult any information related to the safety of him/her or their friends.

If you constantly teach your child not to tattle, you may be hindering them from reporting any other important safety information. You are in part teaching your child not to come to you when he has something to report. If you teach your child the difference, for example: you don't tattle to get someone in trouble, but instead tell mommy to help a friend from potentially be harmed. Again, this stems down to communication. If you simply dismiss everything your child says, and constantly tell him not to tattle you will be hindering the communication channel between the child and parent.

By expressing positive reinforcement for when your child gives a report, your are helping build the trust. When a child comes to you with a report you should reward the child by saying "Great job reporting! You did the right thing! I'm so proud of you." Encouragement with make you child feel safe and secured that he/she is doing the right thing by coming to you with.

The long effects of good communication can stem way beyond adolescents. If you children learn they can come to you with important information at a young age they will continue well into their teenage years. Your now teenage son or daughter may come to you with any concerns about drinking, doing drugs, or sex. If they know your are open to listening to the problem and will actively help and reward them for doing the right thing, your child will grow up in a much more stable environment.

You could look at this in contrast; if you choose to dismiss any reporting your child does, merely shirking it off as tattling. Your child will feel judged, inferior and will not report anymore information to you. Now and later in life, your child will go through changes, school, and relationships without any support because they feel they cannot approach you. By listening and building good communication skills at a young age you will be helping to build a good structure for your child's life in the long run.