Sexless Marriage: Blocks to Sexual Desire and Intimacy

Physical intimacy is an important component in marriage and long-term relationships. The reasons why a passionate marriage might dwindle into a sexless marriage vary widely. The first step in keeping passion alive over the long haul is to understand the roadblocks to emotional and physical intimacy .

In addition to the natural reduction of sexual desire and frequency that occurs in long-term marriages/relationships, there are other factors that may be contributing to a lackluster sex life.

Here are a few to consider:

~Hormonal changes associated with pre-menopause and menopause (it is estimated that one in four premenopausal women and one in three menopausal women struggle with low sexual desire)

~Low levels of testosterone (high testosterone levels are associated with heightened sexual desire in both men and women)

~Stress (the adverse effects of stress are well-documented and can easily dampen your interest in sex)

~ Depression (low sexual desire is a common symptom of depression )

~Side effects of certain medications (including many anti-depressant medications, high blood pressure medications)

~Emotional conflicts over sexuality (I will be examining the power that negative attitudes about sex can have on relationships in future articles)

~Unresolved anger or resentment toward your partner

~Poor communication between you and your partner

~Sexual performance anxieties (common in men but also prevalent in women)

~Fatigue (caused by stress, a medical condition or insomnia)

~History of trauma (especially sexual abuse )

If you or your partner struggle with low sexual desire, it's always a good idea to rule out any possible medical causes as the primary cause of low libido. I've heard many stories of individuals and couples spending loads of money in marriage/couples counseling only to discover that a medical condition was the central cause of a lack of physical intimacy .

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To make passion and intimacy a regular part of your relationship, check out Dr. Nicastro's Passion, Sex and Intimacy workbook.