Peak Performers Manage Their Strengths and Weaknesses, Part Two: Our Strengths

Our Strengths

A) The Big Picture

We all have strengths. But we cannot just smugly sit self-satisfied like a Cheshire cat. Rather we need to further develop our strong points because it’s a matter of using them or losing them. Dwight D. Eisenhower (1890~1969) explains, “Our real problem, then, is not our strength today; it is rather the vital necessity of action today to ensure our strength tomorrow.” As a military commander he knew we must never run from, but squarely face adversity, for we gain the strength we have overcome.

How strong is an ant? Scientists in Krakow, Poland were astonished to see an ant holding a dead bird in the air weighing 500 times more than the ant. That would be equivalent to a 200-pound man holding 50 tons in the air (National Geographic, December, 1996)! You, too, have enormous power at your disposal, but it is often overlooked and neglected. I’m referring to the power of commitment. With it you can make the ‘impossible” possible. People do not lack strength; they lack commitment. And if you cultivate it, you will be laying a firm foundation for success.

It is a sign of strength to be weak, to know it, and to manage it, but a sign of weakness to be unaware of our faults and mistakenly believe we are strong. Oddly enough, many people are unaware of their many strengths. It is important to recognize our inner resources, for until we do, we will fail to use them. The sad fact is a strong person unaware of his strength is no more useful than a weak person.

How can we make sure we are not overlooking our strengths? A good way to identify personal strengths you have overlooked is to ask yourself a series of questions, such as the following.

Do I hunger for success? Do I set goals and am I eager to take action to realize them? Am I excited by life? Am I curious? Do I love adventure? Do I live courageously? Do I like to support others, lead, or both? Am I patient? Am I a risk taker? Do I get along with others? Do I look at the pros and cons before acting? Can I depend on myself? Do I encourage others and offer praise where it is due? Do I respect and learn from others? Do I see the potential in others and in myself? Do I control my emotions or do I allow them to control me? Do I balance work and recreation? Do I look after my general well-being or do I neglect myself? Am I organized? Am I a visionary and see what others miss? Do I have a positive outlook? Am I a peacemaker? Do I empathize with others? Am I interested in what works and what doesn’t? Do I embrace change or do I prefer the status quo? Do I love to learn and apply new things? Am I a thinker, planner, and doer? Do I always strive to do my best? Am I gentle and kind? Am I generous? Am I understanding and accepting?

B) The Danger Of Our Strengths Changing To Weaknesses

Once we become aware of our strengths, we need to regularly monitor them, for unless we are careful, they could turn into weaknesses and halt our progress. Here are some examples of what I mean.

1. Self-confidence is good, but when we are too confident, we stop learning .
2. When we are overly concerned about personal problems, we become blind to the problems of others.
3. It is good to be prudent, but unless we are willing to take risks, we cannot go very far in life.
4. Decisiveness is a strength, but guard against stubbornness.
5. Striking while the iron is hot is a positive trait, but acting rashly can lead to a downfall.
6. Self-discipline can lead you to expect too much of others.
7. Thoroughness is good, but it can turn into perfectionism.
8. It’s good to be supportive, but not when you conform to every wish of others.
9. If you are too patient, things will never get done.
10. Diplomacy helps, but not when you allow others to take advantage of you.
11. Self-starters sometimes have problems working harmoniously with others.
12. Decisiveness is a strength, but not when you fail to consider other viewpoints.
13. Determination is a strong point, unless one is headstrong, one-sided, and aggressive.
14. Being a good speaker is an asset, unless one talks too much.
15. Enthusiasm is contagious, but enthusiastic people can come on too strong.
16. Creativity and an active imagination make some visionaries and others unrealistic dreamers.

C) Example Strengths

1. Faith, trust, and confidence. Unshakeable faith in ourselves and the world create a launching pad for success, for as William James (1842~1910) taught, “Pessimism leads to weakness, optimism to power”

2. Excited by life. Or, as Vincent van Gogh (1853~1890) said, “Love many things, for therein lies the true strength, and whosoever loves much performs much, and can accomplish much, and what is done in love is done well.”

3. Living Courageously. After all, this is the bedrock of a happy life. Rabindranath Tagore (1861~1941) prays, “Let me not pray to be sheltered from dangers but to be fearless in facing them. Let me not beg for the stilling of my pain, but for the heart to conquer it. Let me not look for allies in life's battlefield but to my own strength. Let me not cave in.” Arnold Schwarzenegger continues, “Strength does not come from winning. Your struggles develop your strength. When you go through hardship and decide not to surrender, that is strength.”

4. Getting along with others. The Dalai Lama fills in the details, “In my own limited experience I have found that the more we care for the happiness of others, the greater is our own sense of well-being. Cultivating a close, warmhearted feeling for others automatically puts the mind at ease. It helps remove whatever fears or insecurities we may have and gives us the strength to cope with any obstacles we encounter. It is the principal source of success in life. Since we are not solely material creatures, it is a mistake to place all our hopes for happiness on external development alone. The key is to develop inner peace .”

5. Self-discipline (self-leadership). Self-discipline is an essential ingredient of success, and, therefore, a major strength. Judith Viorst aptly explains the true meaning of strength, “Strength is the capacity to break a chocolate bar into four pieces with your bare hands -- and then eat just one of the pieces.”Also, to be angry at a weak person is proof that you are also weak.

6. Follow-through. The greatest idea and the finest intention are utterly worthless unless we follow through. If you need some help in this area, I recommend, “FOLLOWING THROUGH, A Revolutionary New Model for Finishing Whatever You Start,” by Steve Levinson, Ph.D. and Pete Greider, M.Ed., Unlimited Publishing , 2007.
http://www.amazon.com/Following-Through-Revolutionary-Finishing-Whatever...

7. Compassion. Compassion is love in action. The more of it we give away, the more of it comes back to us. Here’s something to keep in mind; if we are not compassionate toward others, how can we be compassionate toward ourselves?

8. Responsibility. We all have challenges, but when Tom prayed for a helping hand to solve his problems, God said, “I already gave you a helping hand. It is attached to your arm.” When we accept responsibility, we realize that God helps those who help themselves. Sure, there are always excuses available if you are weak enough to use them, but wouldn’t you rather be strong?

I’m going to end with two relevant quotations, followed by three books for recommended reading.

“Those who gave thee a body, furnished it with weakness; but He who gave thee Soul, armed thee with resolution. Employ it, and thou art wise; be wise and thou art happy.” Akhenaton (King of Egypt, 14th century BC)

“A true friend knows your weaknesses but shows you your strengths; feels your fears but fortifies your faith ; sees your anxieties but frees your spirit; recognizes your disabilities but emphasizes your possibilities.” William Arthur Ward (1921~1994)

RECOMMENDED READING
TAKE 10! How to Achieve Your ‘Someday’ Dreams by Rory Cohen, Cornelia Flannery, and Kristin Biörn http://www.take10now.com/our-book/

THE STRENGTH WITHIN: Find Your Life Anchors and Cultivate Habits of Wholeness, Hope, and Joy by Barbara Hansen, Ph.D., HiddenSpring, 2000.
http://www.amazon.com/Strength-Within-Anchors-Cultivate-Wholeness/dp/158...

THE WINNER'S BIBLE: Rewire Your Brain for Permanent Change by Dr. Kerry Spackman, Greenleaf Book Group Press, 2009 http://www.amazon.com/Winners-Bible-Rewire-Permanent-Change/dp/160832015...