When it comes to parenting our kids, most of us follow in the footsteps of our own parents as their parenting strategies are what we remember best. If this is the method you've been using and it's simply not working for you, then it's time to give some new parenting techniques and discipline tactics a trial run.
It would be sensational if there was a one-size-fits-all solution for disciplining children that worked for everybody, but there's not. All children are unique with different natures, which is the reason discipline strategies that are effective with other children might not be effective with your children.
Keeping that in mind, the discipline tips below may or may not work with your child, but they are well worth trying:
Take Away Whatever Your Child Enjoys Most
When you have determined the object, activity or privilege your child values most, you can take it away it as a disciplinary measure. For example, you could withdraw your child's favorite toy or prevent your child from playing with a friend or neighbor that day. Your child is less likely to repeat the bad behavior when something very important to them is at risk of being taken away.
Set Up Predictable Consequences
It's important for your child to be fully aware that every time they repeat a certain bad behavior they will have to endure the same unplesant consequence.
Bad Behavior A should always bring 'Consequence A' and your child should be absolutely sure of this. If the consequences remain the same, your child is far more likely to abide by your rules as they are aware of exactly what's going to happen if they don't.
Never Cave In
One of the worst mistakes you can make as a parent is giving in to your child's requests when they are whining, arguing or throwing a tantrum, as it simply teaches them that this behavior is a means of to get their own way.
And once they have reached this conclusion, they will continue repeating this unpleasant behavior in an attempt to get their own way more often. It only takes you giving in a couple of times for this concept to form in your child's mind. So stay strong, firm and stick to your guns, and your child will soon learn that this sort of behavior will get them nowhere.
Give Instructions With Only 1 Warning Following
Give directions to your child once with only one warning after that clearly outlining what the consequences will be for not complying. Skip having to continually nag your child to get things done, give them only 1 warning, then apply the consequences. Giving your child two opportunities to get a task done is ample and fair.
Present Your Child Two Options To Select From
A fabulous technique that helps your child feel more independent and in control is to offer them two choices to select from. These can be little things like selecting between taking out the garbage or feeding the family pet for older children, or for younger children it could be a choice between picking up all the red blocks or the blue blocks. You can also use this technique as a discipline strategy if your child refuses to cooperate, like getting dressed for example - just offer your child two outfits to selectfrom as a way to take the focus off the power struggle over getting dressed.
Ask For Your Child's Help
It may seem difficult to believe if you are dealing with a defiant child right now, but the truth is that all children are born into this world innately programmed to be helpful and cooperative. And you can take advantage of this natural tendency whenever you need to by giving your child a ‘job’ to do that will prevent or resolve a tantrum.
The next time your child battles over getting into his or her car seat, give them the job of being the ‘boss of the seatbelts’ to help make sure that everyone is safe. At the grocery store try giving your child the job of being your 'navigator' to help you find you way around the store or your 'lookout' to make a game out of helping you find particular items.
Not only is this an outstanding way to take your child's focus off undesirable behavior, it's also a great way to make them feel needed and boost their self-esteem .
Make Good Behavior A Fun Experience For Your Child
It's sounds odd, but disipline really can be made fun. Getting your child to cooperate can be as simple as making make a task enjoyable for them to do. The majority of kids love a fun challenge, so when it comes to putting away the toys, make a fun game of it by announcing: “Let's see who can pick up five toys the fastest, Ready, Set, Go!”.
Allow Your Child Redo's
We've all had the experience of wishing we could take something we've said back right after we blurted it out. We all know how it feels. So, when your child back-chats or yells at you, a good way to keep the peace in your household instead of being drawn into a big fight is to allow a ‘redo,’ giving your child an opportunity to say it again in a more respectful manner. Giving redos ultimately affords you the chance to then calmly discuss the issue that incited the regrettable comment to begin with.
Not only does allowing a redo when your child talks back to you or yells at you keep the situation from escalating, it also teaches your child that addressing people in a calm and respectful tone is a much better way to get the response they are hoping for.
Research Better Ways
No 2 children are identical, therefore no certain discipline strategy works for everybody, which is why it is necessary to explore a range of parenting methods and disciplinary strategies to find what works best for you and your child.
Even if you are at a point where you have read many articles and books on discipline, you have attended parenting classes, sought advice from family and friends, and you have tried a host of different discipline strategies that you have seen work for other parents, and are feeling like you have already tried everything; you haven’t. So don't stress, there's a lot of hope for you to secure an effective way to end your parenting problems yet.
It's just a matter of finding an effective set of parenting guidelines that fit your style of parenting and are ideal to help you manage your challenging, spirited, stubborn or hard-to-manage child.
If you are finding it difficult to manage a child who is strong-willed, challenging, difficult, stubborn, hell-raising or just plain impossible, a great resource I recommend that will help you learn how to understand and effectively discipline your child using a unique set of parenting strategies is the Happy Child Guide .
The 9 tips for discipline of children covered in this article are a brief extract from the full report 42 Ways To Discipline Your Child which you can download for FREE at http://happychildguidereviews.net