If you are having trouble finding a good man , chances are you have no idea where to find them or even worse, you have no idea what a good man is. The quest of looking for mr right is one that you can succeed with just one simple change in focus and a few tips on where a good man goes .

Before embarking on any mission, you must know the destination. People hit only what they aim at, and this goes for women looking for men as well.

Sharpening your focus toward finding exactly what you want is the only way you'll ever get it. Not focusing on what you want will leave you running around in circles like a headless chicken. The key to finding a good man is focus!

A while ago, when I first started understanding the power of focus, I sat down and wrote four pages worth of notes detailing what I wanted in a woman. Everything from the color of her hair and eyes to her values and morals. I read over those pages every night and within a month I met the woman of my dreams . Coincidence? I think not.

The power of focus is undeniable. Psychology teaches that whatever we focus on we move toward. This applies to all areas in life, not just love and relationships. You can use it with everything!t large crowds. When a convention that you are interested in comes to town, attend it! You

Now that you understand focus, what can you do to succeed in finding a good man and attract your ideal mr right ? Please allow me to tell you.

First, men are visual creatures. Unconsciously, they base a lot of their attraction on looks. How you present yourself and the things you do will influence the type of men that you attract.

I find it really funny when girls who complain about not finding a good man go out on the town dressed like hookers with a ton of make-up on. Seriously, do they think finding a good man means going out looking like that?

If your goal is finding a good man , start thinking like one. What would a good man think of a woman who was dressed like Julia Roberts from Pretty Woman? He'd think she was a tramp and do anything in his power to avoid her and the possible STD's that she contracted. Either that or try and sleep with her. After all, you can't contract herpes twice, right?

The appearance of a woman (not necessarily her looks) plays a major part in who she ends up with. If you project a sex kitten aura , guess what? Guys are going to want to have sex with you.

When I chat with my female friends about this issue they all say something along the lines of "no shit".

Well, if this advice was so well known, why are women finding themselves with the same kind of man every time? The answer lies in how you present yourself and the methods you use to attract men.

When I was having problems meeting women, I went out and tried to attract all of them. I didn't care about what the woman was like, I just wanted to feel attractive. This led to more depression and pain than when I was lonely!

My "shotgun" approach to attraction was a failure. Not only did I attract far fewer women than I had hoped, but the ones I did were not my type!

If you have a resume and would like a job in your particular field, would you apply to all jobs available? I don't think so.

Even if you did just concentrate on your field, would you send as many resumes as you could to as many companies as possible? Most people do.

The shotgun method, whether you are looking for a job or looking for Mr. Right, rarely works. And even when it does, it usually ends up a failure (unless you're lucky). Your focus should be laser-like, concentrating on only the type of man you are looking to attract.

Now, let's get something straight here. I have no idea what you think Mr. Right is like so I am not here to tell you should be looking for. You are going to have to figure that out on your own. After all, a "good man" is different for all women and until you fully understand what it is you are looking for, you'll never find it. This is especially true in finding a good man .

Also, your self-worth plays a very important role. What you think of yourself and what you believe you deserve will attract a guy that will match it. If you think you're pathetic, you'll get yourself a pathetic man. I can tell you out of experience that no man wants to be with a woman who thinks she's not worthy unless he too thinks the same about himself. Same goes for women.

Alright, so I bet you're wondering: "So, when are you going to tell me where to find a good good man for myself?" If you are thinking this, go up a few paragraphs and read again. If you're too lazy, allow me to reiterate. Discovering where to find a good man depends on what you think a man should be.

If you're looking for a drunk, manipulative man, go to bar. If you want a pervert, hang out at a strip club. If you want a drug addict, hang out in an alley. And so on.

All I'm doing here is writing about common sense. Common sense that is thrown right out the window when it comes to love. Remember that old saying "love is blind"? It's true. So it's about time you focus on where your mr right should be then you'll have a chance conquering the blindness that many women experience.

Some very good tips on where a good man goes have been discussed so many times that my suggesting them will seem redundant. However, my intentions are far from trying to fuel redundancy. I am a firm believer that repetition is the key to mastery, and the more you hear something the more likely you'll be in acting on it and using it.

So when I tell you finding a good man at the grocery store is very easy, you shouldn't be surprised. A guy that's doing his own grocery shopping says a lot about him. He's independent, self sufficient, and will probably be very helpful in a relationship. But you already knew that. So why were you at Kokomo's last night dressed like an eastern European call girl?

How about church? I know you must be cringing at those words, but think about it...if a man is at church on Sunday morning, what's the chance that he was out getting hammered the night before? Even if he was hammered, he's thoughtful enough to attend church with his mother. That should be enough to place your first bid, no?

Okay, so church isn't your thing. I understand. How about volunteering somewhere? What kind of man volunteers? You got it! He's a caring, unselfish man who will do everything he can to make you happy. Not only will you have the opportunity to mingle with volunteers, but you'll also get the opportunity to meet other men who actually work at the institution you are volunteering in.

Be careful on where you decide to volunteer. Make sure that the cause you are about to help in is a place where a good man goes . You don't want to volunteer at a place where there are only women. Try Greenpeace or anything to do with the outdoors - any sport is ideal.

Speaking of sports , why not play golf? You know how many men are out on the course at any given time? A ton! And I'm not talking about old men here either. I'm talking about successful, socially healthy, good looking men who enjoy the outdoors. It is very easy finding a good man at the golf course, but I rarely see women there looking for mr right . Men who play golf are generally better off financially, healthier, and more likely to deal with frustration than men who don't. Why? I have no idea. Ask the researchers.

Take part in a marathon that is for charity . These marathons almost never require you to complete the entire route and are not competitive. Usually it is broken down in 5 and 10 mile distances. Thank God because I wouldn't have used this if I had to run the distance of a million football fields. Well, not that many, but you get the idea.

You can also just walk at a charity marathon, meeting a lot of guys who are doing the same. God knows I was one of those men. Not only do I refuse to run long distances, I also can't run. So yah, chat with the good guys like me. You'll make us feel better for crawling along like sloths.

Go to coffee shops. You know, the ones with nice leather couches and attractive men working on their lap tops. Coffee shops are awesome to start up conversation and an excellent place to frequent if you are having problems finding a good man for yourself. Most people link drinking coffee with social interaction, and if you strategically position yourself next to a guy sitting by himself, a conversation is almost guaranteed to start up.

Have you ever been to a convention? If you haven't, I can tell you that you will have at least one common interest with all the men there, giving you an excellent chance of finding a good man that you're compatible with.

I could go on all day. I'm actually worrying myself knowing all this stuff on where to find a good man. Maybe it's because I am a good man and know where a good man goes to meet women. That's what I tell myself, anyway.

Now you have some ideas on where to find a good man and how you should go about looking for mr right . It is up to you to tweak those ideas into ones that fit your personality, needs, and wants. Nobody, especially a guy on the Internet, can tell you exactly where a good man goes because only you know what your mr right is like. It is your life, and only when you know exactly what you want will you be able to take any advice and use it to its full potential.

Good luck.

Author's Bio: 

Jesse Allen is the main contributor to the website www.approachandseduce.com and freelance writer. He has tried many seduction programs and provides free tips to seduce women on his site and through his official newsletter.