You Are The Leader

Every aspect of your life is connected. Workplace and home. Professional and personal relationships. Spirituality and success. I write about leadership, because in every part of life, we are leaders. We make decisions. We affect others. We want to accomplish goals. There are people in every part of our respective lives who look to us for help, for guidance, or for direction.

No matter where you go in life--you are there. Your character, values, and way of being are what you bring to each relationship and to each setting. The results you produce in each setting are dependent on your understanding of life principles. For example, the principle of responsibility. When you take responsibility for your situation you become powerful. When you insist on remaining a victim, you are powerless. Principles such as responsibility are unchanging in all parts of your life. You are a leader everywhere you go.

The principles that make you successful in one setting, make you successful in other settings. For example, the principle of responsibility tells us that we create our own reality. No one else is responsible for who we are or for the decisions we make. We each own our respective lives. We own the roles that we play. In your work, everything you do has your signature on it. The relationship you have with each person has your signature on it. Many people perform various tasks just because they are told. This is the wrong reason to do something. If you do something because someone else tells you to do it, it's not yours.

Responsibility means that you do things because you want to do them. For example, in my business, I don't especially like record keeping. I need to keep records. I need to know where I stand. Therefore, I want to do the task. I do the task because it is the right thing for me to do. As a leader at home and at work, embrace the roles you play. Own your role as a parent or grandparent. Own your role as a spouse. At work, own your job. Your effectiveness is diminished if you don't own it. If you are blaming and complaining about others, you aren't owning it. As an owner of your role, the question is: "What do I want to have happen and what can I do right now to move in that direction?"

Responsibility in relationships means you own each relationship that you have. People tend to feel that they are innocent receivers in relationships. In fact, you are an active participant in your relationships. The assumptions you hold about others; what you say and what you don't say; how you say it; and your judgments and opinions all have an impact. Everything you think, feel, say, and do is teaching other people how to respond to you. Own your relationships rather than complaining about them. A leader is a center of influence. Your focus is on what effect you are having on others and how you are teaching them to respond to you.

If you hold a leadership title (Manager, COO, CEO, CFO, Teacher, Principal, VP, Dad, Mom, Grandpa, Grandma, Director, Team Leader, Committee Leader, Board Member, Consultant, Author, Coach, Minister, Priest, Rabbi, Chairperson, etc.) you are a leader of leaders. Your role is to help others to take responsibility and own their roles. You do this through your example; praising the efforts of others; thanking people for what they do; helping them with their problems; offering clear, yet compassionate feedback; and helping them clarify their goals. In addition to responsibility, there are two other principles, or keys, that I believe are essential to your ability to help others lead. They are:
• responsiveness and• clarity.
If you are responsive to others, you treat all people with care and respect. You think of people in terms of their needs, not your needs. If you have clarity, you know who you are and what your priorities are. You make your thoughts, words, and actions consistent with your priorities.

If there is an area of life where you would like to be a more effective leader, think in terms of these three keys.
* Where in this situation or relationship can I take more responsibility? More ownership?* Where can I be more responsive to other people, more understanding of their needs?
* Am I clear? What is the direction of this group or relationship, and am I focusing my energy on what is most important in terms of the mission, the goals, and the values of this group? Wherever you are, you can lead. You are a center of influence whose thoughts, emotions, words, and actions all have a ripple effect. In any situation where something is needed, the opportunity is there. You are the leader.