There is no passion to be found... in settling for a life that is less than the one you are capable of living. ~ Nelson Mandela

I was just on a phone call with a very close friend and we were discussing the content of my articles over the past few months. The title of this article is actually one of the statements she made in the course of our conversation. She has done a lot of self-study, read many self-help books , is very successful in her life overall but is at a point of wanting to make some changes and, the question remains, "it all sounds so easy....but where do I start?"

The very first step is to identify what you want in life. For many women, however, the past few decades have been spent caring for anyone and everyone but themselves. It feels foreign to ask, or even answer, that question - "What do I want?"

In my coaching practice, I work with women in business and ask them the same question, "What do you want to have happen in your business?" Blank stares. Pauses in conversation. Uncertainty.

As many of you know, one of the tools with which I work is the Life Balance Wheel. When working with women in business, I customize that wheel to become the Business Balance Wheel (spokes are labelled as marketing, finances, team members, products, services, systems etc.).

To begin the process of identifying what you want to have happen in your life (or your business) that's not happening now, simply label the spokes of the respective wheel. On a scale of 1-10, for each spoke, make note of where you are on the spoke. Connect the dots, color in the spokes, and you will get a visual sense of what your wheel looks like/feels like (when you start to think about it).

Choose one of the spokes and begin by making a list:

1. Identify what you don't want to have happen (we're very good at that, typically); ex. - for the Family spoke - I don't want Christmas to be the emotional upset that it was last year; for Business, in Marketing for instance, I don't want to have to go to another networking event!

2. On the opposite side of that list, identify what you DO want to have happen (which is usually just the opposite of the answers you have for no. 1 above)

3. Take that first item on the "What I DO Want" list and make it happen - today!

Now I know that many of you will be wondering about the need for a 6-month, 1-year, 5-year plan. Yes, that's important too. However, you want to start somewhere. Then, celebrate the completion of your first step and go for the second one. Baby steps! That's what it's all about.

When I was on my trip around the world, I had some similar thoughts as we visited the pyramids in Cairo. They are phenomenal. The 'vision' must have been overwhelming; however, as you take a close look at the pyramids, you will see that they were built, one stone at a time. Same way with living your life! It's not so scary when you take it one step at a time.

Author's Bio: 

Pat Mussieux is an expert coach on mind-set and goal-setting techniques, helping female baby-boomers add more happiness to their daily lives. To get your free CD: "The 10 Steps2Happiness", visit http://www.steps2happiness.com

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