While one will come into contact with people who will take their energy, they are also going to come into contact with people who won’t. And it could be said that the ideal will be for them to spend more time around the latter than the former.

How Life is

When this is how one experiences life, they are generally going to spend time around people who have positive effect on them. There will be what these people bring to their life and there will be what one brings to their life.

These relationships are going to be based on give and take, as opposed to simply taking from others or giving to others. As a result of this, this area of their life is likely to be in balance.

Imperfect

Still, this doesn’t mean that an equal exchange will take place every time they see someone they are close to. There are likely to be moments when they give more, and moments when they receive more.

But overall, these people will meet some of their needs and one will meet some of their needs. What this comes down to is that it is not going to be possible for these people to meet all of their needs, or for one to meet every need that another person has.

A Small Part

Ultimately, there will be a lot of needs that one will need to meet for themselves. If they were to rely on other people to meet all of their needs, it would end up causing them a lot of problems.

In this case, one would be behaving more like a dependent human being than an interdependent human being. The people in their life would be seen as being more like their parents than their friends.

Responsibility

When one is accountable for their own needs, it will be a lot easier for them to get them met, and this is because they won’t look towards a few people to meet them. For example, if they want to achieve something, they will take the initiative.

The alterative would be for them to expect one of their friends to make something happen for them. One would then be giving their power away, and this might stop them from achieving something.

Both Ways

In addition to this, the people they are close to will also realise that there is only so much that one can do for them. This will mean that one will do what they can for them, but they won’t be expected to solve their problems or to save them, for instance.

One is going to have good boundaries and the people around them also will, and this is going to allow this area of their life to nourish them. And as they have good boundaries, it can also show that they are in touch with how they feel.

Connected

The reason for this is that having boundaries will allow them to feel safe and, through feeling safe, there will be able to listen to what is taking place within them. What is taking place within them is then going to have a big effect on their behaviour and how they lead their life in general.

Through being in touch with what is taking place within them, it will make it a lot easier for them to spend time around the right people. This is going to be one of the reasons why they have people like this in their life already.

The Other Part

What will also play a part here is that one is likely to value themselves, and this will stop them from putting up with bad behaviour. So, if they were to come into contact with someone who had a negative effect on them, they would feel uncomfortable, and this would cause them to take action.

Their own wellbeing is going to be their priority, and it is going to be in their best interest to put themselves first. If they tolerated what was taking place and allowed them to drain their energy, it is only going to cause them harm.

Another Reality

But although there will be people who experience life in this way, there will be others who don’t. Due to this, they could be used to being around people who squeeze all the goodness out of them, so to speak.

One could find that they feel drained when they are around them, and that they feel just as bad when they are not in their presence. Yet, as soon as they begin to feel better, they might soon be around someone who drains them.

Emotionally Disconnected

However, even though one will be used to feeling drained, it doesn’t mean that they are aware of what is taking place in their body. Or, if they do have moments when they are aware of what is taking place, they might not listen to the information what is within them.

And through experiencing life in this way, it is going to make it a lot harder for them to tell if another person is toxic. The guidance they need will be in their body, but they won’t listen to it.

What’s going on?

What this can show is that one is carrying a lot of pain in their body, and this is why they are living on the surface of themselves. The downside is that even though this stops them from having to be overwhelmed by the emotional pain and/or trauma that is in their body, it sets them up to be an easy target.

Their ability to know if someone is right for them is offline, and it could be said that one is nothing more than a sitting duck. Therefore, the sooner this changes the better their life will be.

Awareness

When one has disconnected from their body, it can be the result of what they have experienced in their adult life, or it could be due to what happened when they were younger. Along with dealing with what they are carrying in their body, they may need to embrace their inherent value and to develop boundaries.

This is not say that this is a separate process though, as when they let go of the pain that is within them everything else can fall into place. The assistance of a therapist or a healer may be needed here.

Author's Bio: 

Prolific writer, author, and coach, Oliver JR Cooper, hails from England. His insightful commentary and analysis covers all aspects of human transformation, including love, partnership, self-love, and inner awareness. With over one thousand three hundred in-depth articles highlighting human psychology and behaviour, Oliver offers hope along with his sound advice. His current projects include 'A Dialogue With The Heart' and 'Communication Made Easy'.

To find out more go to - http://www.oliverjrcooper.co.uk/

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