If one was to stop eating and drinking it wouldn’t be long before they would start to experience problems. And if this went on for too long, they would soon die. But while one is likely to be aware of their physical needs in most cases, what they might not be aware of is what is going on for them emotionally.
Or if they are aware of what is going on, they might end up ignoring it. This relates to how one feels about something or someone. The ideal is for emotions to flow, just like a river. And if one can’t deal with them as and when they arise, like a river that is monetarily blocked, they will process them shortly after.
Is this blockage only lasts for a short time, nothing too damaging is likely to occur. But if this continues to build, the rest of the river will end up being compromised by what is happening further ahead. And if it goes on for too long, it could end up pushing through the blockage and exploding out.
And this is similar to how emotional blockages work in human beings. When the rest of the river is affected, it is like one repressing how they feel. And when it explodes out, it is like someone becoming emotionally out of control and reactive.
Emotions can’t be seen directly and while this is the case, they are still playing a missive role in one’s life. One can either embrace them or they can deny them, but there will be consequences nevertheless.
This is not to say that one should always express how they feel in each and every moment, which would be just as dysfunctional as repressing them. At times it won’t be right to reveal how one feels and this is when it will be necessary for one to deal with them when the moment has passed.
Holding The Experience
To be able to contain how they feel and to the hold the emotional experience within them will be imperative. This will mean that one needs to be able to regulate their emotions.
And if one can regulate how they feel, it will also make it possible for them to act assertively. Through doing this, one will have the option of resolving what is playing a part in their emotional reaction. Or if they can’t get this far, they will at least do their best.
So if one can’t regulate how they feel and act assertively when their feelings arise, they will have formed a habit of denying them. This could cause them to be completely disconnected from how they feel.
And if this habit has lasted for quiet some time, it could also result in one exploding emotionally. So the situation may call for a mild reaction and yet through ones emotional build up, they over react. They don’t experience the situation for what it is, what they experience is the situation, plus, many months or even years worth of emotions.
How one feels will have to stay inside their body and there is going to be all kinds of things that can happen through this. For one thing, one is likely to feel weak and drained. And this is to be expected; their emotional body is being loaded up with emotional weight.
So one can’t expect to feel free and empowered, this is not going to be possible. Through these emotions staying trapped in one’s body, one could end up in a constant state of anger or anxiety . At first it may have related to one experience that they had or a number of experiences and yet now it has become a way of life and colours everything they do.
One could end up being passive aggressive and all because they don’t open up about how they feel. So they end up carrying their experience and unable to move on from what happened. Boredom is often seen as something that appears when one has nothing to do and is not getting enough stimulation. And yet it can also be because they feel emotional blocked.
How one feels can then end up influencing their physical body. They may experience throat problems for instance and this is because this is the area of one’s truth. So when one is unable to speak up, tension is likely to arise. This could be in the form of a sore throat or even stomach problems.
The stomach is the area of the ego and this area of the body decides whether something is safe or not. And if one doesn’t feel safe to express how they feel, then it will be primarily due to what is going on here.
If one finds that they have a pattern of holding in how they feel and are therefore not expressing themselves, either assertively or when the situation passes, it will be because this is what feels safe. And if one doesn’t have a pattern and just odes it in certain situations, this will also be the result of what feels safe.
One may have learnt at a young age that it wasn’t safe to express how they feel and that if they did, they would be harmed either verbally or physically for instance.
This means that one will need to question the associations that have been formed around speaking up for themselves. To question these and then to behave differently might be enough for some people.
Other people may have trapped emotions that need to be released and as this is done, they will feel safe to act assertively or to express their emotions in a safe environment shortly after.
Prolific writer, thought leader and coach, Oliver JR Cooper hails from the United Kingdom. His insightful commentary and analysis covers all aspects of human transformation; love, partnership, self-love, and inner awareness. With several hundred in-depth articles highlighting human psychology and behavior, Oliver offers hope along with his sound advice. Current projects include "A Dialogue With The Heart" and "Communication Made Easy."
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