One of the most difficult layers for us to resolve is the one related to self-love. What is self-love? It is the ability to view who you are with unconditional compassion and acceptance. I’ve mentioned this before, and it is worth mentioning this again: anytime we are trying to “fix” something about ourselves, whether it’s through self-help, plastic surgery, or more education, training-whatever, we have to be very clear about the intention of our actions. We must ask ourselves is our behavior based out of resistance to who we are, or out of the necessity to embrace who we are? It is so wonderful to grow emotionally into a greater love towards our selves and others, physically into a greater sense of health and trust towards our highly intelligent bodies, mentally towards more peace and focus, and spiritually towards the oneness and interconnectedness of all of life. These are important lodestones to living a fulfilling life, but when we are out to change something, because we feel we are not good enough, valued enough, loved enough, autonomous enough etc, we might run the risk of taking a resistance based action, which rarely will catapult you into alignment with your true self. In fact, it is not possible to truly love yourself, if you do not first recognize the perfection of who you are: no matter how unpleasant your behavior , thoughts, feelings and life experience may be. Where you’re at now is sacred. It is the culmination of this very moment that brings you into a greater sense of love towards yourself-and nothing, or no one can take your free will to recognize that, away form you.

Now that we’ve addressed the basic problem: resistance towards your nature and who you are, I would like to explore even more deeply, the effects that the non-recognition of self-love perpetuate. Man of us have an area of our life that we tend to focus deeply on: our relationships, our life purpose, our family, our diet , our looks-whatever. Most of us also, do not know how to practice pure positive focus. This is primarily because of the lack of awareness. A lack of awareness stems from your attachments to a particular belief: my experience of love will come from this ONE person and not from all of life, the money in my bank account MUST come from exact job and not from a greater alignment with my true self, my family must fit this exact perfect picture and meet my expectations of what is true on every level; do you see the trend here? Lack of openness and flexibility in our thinking is greatly attributed to our suffering. When we lock ourselves away in a certain opinion or perspective, we are practicing self-awareness, but not necessarily universal awareness.

What is universal awareness? It is the ability to consciously view yourself with compassion and love (or pure positive focus) in every situation, experience and interaction. To have an experience of this level of awareness, is to completely tune yourself in to the bigger picture of all of life, which trusts that only good exists and that anything outside of this so-called, perceived “goodness”, is just a manner in which you are reaching more goodness, more love and of course, more expansion into universal awareness. When I reference “more expansion”, I do so to illuminate the importance of stretching our thinking, our beliefs and our perspectives. The more we go out of our way to experience new activities,people, places and unlikely experiences-the more likely we are to stretch our consciousness outside of the narrow and confined tunnel vision which stems from inflexibility, stuckness, fear and of course, the false-belief of non-deserving. I am focused on the idea of “non-deserving”, for a few reasons-the first being that this is a false CONDITION, and conditions can be changed. The second reason is that this is one of the single greatest universal blockages to manifesting our true reality that we experience in the human realm. Do you feel like you should have more respect from someone, someone should love you more, you should have more money, more friends, more kindness and compassion? Do you feel that you don’t have enough money, enough time, enough “goodness”? The reason why you do not have these things, is because you feel that you do not deserve them. The awareness of this belief “I do not deserve” can come from you tuning into the way you speak to yourself and others: “I do not have enough money” actually means “I do not deserve money”, “My partner does not appreciate me” actually means “I do not deserve to be appreciated.” This is not to invalidate that you don’t have money, when you truly don’t or that you’re not appreciated at home, when you really aren’t, but rather this is to validate and to assist you in calling attention to the BELIEFS, THOUGHTS and predominant BEHAVIORS that perpetuate the manifestation of these experiences in your life.

How can you not deserve love, prosperity , friendship , happiness if they exist!? Your only obstacle in obtaining the very thing you are lacking is to believe that you deserve it. To believe you must recognize that nothing and no-one in the world can replicate your unique perspective, intentions, thoughts and experiences, and that this unique existence, which is yours, is VALUABLE. There is nothing and no-one on this entire planet with the unique life experience that you are having right now. In this unique experience, you have everything it takes to connect with the source of all that you are. Once you learn to connect with this source through your awareness of thought, word and beliefs, you will be much more likely to co-create the desired reality which you have imagined for yourself all along.

Author's Bio: 

Kasia Jarosinska is a certified Kundalini yoga instructor and writer living in San Diego, CA. She has been published in local lifestyle magazines, Eco-living publications and international fashion magazines.