It is often said that human beings not only want to be noticed by others, they also want to be appreciated by them. But while these are two needs that each and every one of us would like to have fulfilled, it does mean that other people will always fulfil them.
Generally, one would have these fulfilled by their family , friends and colleagues for instance. And at times, other people are going to enable one to feel noticed and appreciated. If one is famous or well known, this could cause them to have these needs fulfilled more often.
When one does feel acknowledged by others, it is going to make them feel good. It is going to have a positive impact on their life and this means that other people could also benefit. If one feels good, there is the chance that they will want to pass the feeling on to others.
On the other hand, if one doesn’t feel acknowledged by other people, it could make them feel bad. It is unlikely to have a positive impact on their life and other people could also suffer as a result. Through feeling bad, one might want to pass on their pain to others.
But while one person will let this get to them and end up either punishing themselves or others, or both, other people will use it as a catalyst for growth. One can then channel their energy into achieving something significant. With the hope that other people will soon give them the attention they desire.
Of course, one could end up causing all kinds of destruction just to be noticed by others. Or one could achieve things or do things that have no relevance to their own needs and wants. However, if one is not being noticed or appreciated by others it might not matter what kind of attention they get as long as they are noticed.
When one feels acknowledged by another person and this could be by someone they know or have just met, it is going to be because of what the other person does. If they did something else, one is not going to feel acknowledged or if they do, it won’t have the same impact.
And in order to acknowledge another person, one is going to need to be present. Through being present, one will be able to place their attention on the other person. If they are not present, it is going to affect their ability to notice how the other person looks and to absorb what they are saying.
Eye contact is important when it comes to making another person feel acknowledged. If this doesn’t exist or one is not consistent with it, it could cause someone to feel ignored and that they are unimportant.
Shaking another person’s hand is another thing that can make another person feel acknowledged. Without this, they could feel they are not important and that they have been overlooked.
Having manners can make another person feel respected and therefore that they are important. When they don’t exist, other people can feel unappreciated and even invisible.
While some people will talk openly about what matters to them or what they have achieved, not everyone will. This means that some people are going to give one clues as to what they want to be recognised and appreciated for and some people want.
This is why curiosity is so important when it comes to acknowledging someone. Another person could open up, but if they don’t, one is going to need to be interested in what matters to the other person.
And even if the other person does open up, one is still going to need to be curious or else the conversation won’t go very far.
Being curious is one thing, but if one doesn’t care about other people it is only going to get them so far. Having the ability to empathise is going to mean that one can put their own needs and wants to one side and focus on what matters to the other person.
This will allow them to connect with their needs and wants and to find out what brings them joy and fulfilment.
One can improve their communication skills through changing how they behave and this can work. Another approach is to be interested in other people and then their behaviour will naturally change.
If one is not usually present around others or is not interested in what is going on in their life, then it might feel strange or uncomfortable when one does something else. But over time this will change and it will soon become second nature.
Prolific writer, thought leader and coach, Oliver JR Cooper hails from the United Kingdom. His insightful commentary and analysis covers all aspects of human transformation; love, partnership, self-love, and inner awareness. With several hundred in-depth articles highlighting human psychology and behavior, Oliver offers hope along with his sound advice. Current projects include "A Dialogue With The Heart" and "Communication Made Easy."
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