Shopping Too Much?

I’m seeing more and more clients who are banking on retail therapy to get them through this recession. They’re using shopping to numb the worry and stress of unsteady income, shaky jobs, treacherous home mortgages and rising food and gas prices. When they feel bad for whatever reason, off to the mall, bookstore or even grocery store they go. We’ve all heard it: “When the going gets tough, the tough go shopping!”

Amanda recently came to see me because she was at her wit’s end. Amanda has a stressful job as a Chiropractor and she often goes shopping after work. She says, “I just need to relax before I go home to Steve and the kids”. She has a closetful of clothes many she’s never worn - and some still have the tags on.

6 months ago, Amanda tried to hide her purchases from Steve but he found out when he opened the bills and yelled at her. Recently she opened up a new credit card in her own name and used her office address so Steve wouldn’t find out. She’s scared that he’ll leave her if he ever finds out.

At the end of our last phone appointment, Amanda said, “I’m so glad I found you, Cindy. It’s such a relief to be able to tell somebody everything and not have you get mad at me or tell me I’m a bad person.”

Most of us know in our heads that this is a dangerous road but we all have a vice or two. If you’re faced with this dilemma here are a few things you can do:

-Shop with a friend or family member who will hold you accountable (and who won’t join you in making purchases you both know you shouldn’t)
-Use a list and promise yourself not to deviate from it
-Use your debit card (did you know that if you are carrying a balance on your credit card, there is not grace period - interest starts adding on immediately)
-Create a “cooling off” period by putting items on hold and coming back in 24 or 48 hours
-Ask yourself “Do I need this or do I want it?” (Download my free “Needs and Wishes” Worksheet)
-Develop a list of fun things to do and choose one when you feel like shopping
-Know that it’s OK to have the urge to shop and not respond
-Find another way to get your “fix” (thrift stores and garage sales can be just as addictive)
-Stay out of the stores and off the internet if that’s your shopping vice

What’s your vice? What are your alternatives? How will you keep from feeling deprived with your new choices?