Yes it's about quality not quantity. You can spend every waking hour with your partner and have a terrible relationship. And if that's the case then who the heck would want to spend all day with them anyway?
Right? So it's definitely quality over quantity. And it doesn't matter if you've been together for 10 years or 10 months you're going to have to build that intimate relationship around these three things.
Compassion
You've got to have compassion for your significant other regardless of what's happening in or around your life and relationship.
If you don't have compassion towards your partner then you're not going to be able to satisfy his need for love and acceptance from you. Allowing yourself to have compassion for your partner will allow you to love him/her unconditionally.
Loving your partner unconditionally means that you love that person even if you don't love everything about him or her.
All those pet peeves that you are pointing out to your partner is telling him/her that you don't love them unconditionally. No cool.
Compromise
Yes compromise. You have to be willing to be in a give and take relationship. You can't give, give, give all the time and you can't take, take, take all the time either.
It has to be balanced. Learning how and when to compromise in a relationship will save you a lot of pain and suffering in the long run.
It may take you a while to get used to sharing the decisions with another person if you've been single for any length of time but it's worth the effort.
You'll be a lot happier and have a more intimate relationship if you learn to compromise and share the responsibilities with your partner. Besides it'll take a load off your shoulders knowing that you have someone else there to help you make the tough decisions.
Trust/Honesty
I put these two together because they are both vitally important and yet very similar. You can't have honesty without trust and you can't have trust without honesty.
They go together like peanut butter and jelly. And you can't have an intimate relationship with someone unless you honor both trust and honesty.
Just remember do onto others what you would want done onto you. You like it when people treat you with compassion, compromise, trust and honesty, right?
I know you do. That's why you need to do the same for others, especially the person you love and plan to spend the rest of your life with.
Get these three things right from the beginning and you'll be well on your way to a life full of unconditionally love and acceptance; what more could you ask for?
Michelle Sears is the author of a self esteem building website that is packed full of information. Her site was created to help people just like you create a deep loving relationship with yourself. A relationship that will affect every single area of your life - in a good way. Visit her on her website at http://www.selfesteem-building.com or on her Facebook page at http://www.facebook.com/selfesteembuilding