A frequent complaint I hear from my clients is that the things they have been focusing on have not manifested yet. They are doing all the “right” things, believing in themselves, changing their attitude and listening to their self-hypnosis. Even though their thought process has changed dramatically and they feel better on the inside, their true love has still not arrived, the weight hasn’t come off or the big check has not arrived in the mail. What could be the problem?

There are many books, movies and articles on the law of attraction but that is only one law of the universe – not THE law. The “experts” want you to believe that it will come easy but they frequently leave out another important law – the law of reverse effect. This law states that the harder you try, the more the object of your desire moves away from you. The source that activates this law is doubt and fear.

When you feel desperate for something to show up in your life, you unconsciously block it from you. This frantic grasping sends a powerful belief to your inner mind that you will never have it. As you continue to think you will never have it and that is exactly what you experience. By worrying about your current situation, you actually reinforce it. Most people try to think positive, design their dream board and visualize their success, but underneath it all is a grave fear of not getting what they want.

Here are some simple ways to make sure you are not caught up in the law of reverse effect:

1. Hold the feeling as if you already have your desire (the inner mind does not know the difference with what you are seeing in your mind or out in the world).

2. Ask yourself why you want it. What you will gain if you have what you desire – is it security, happiness , confidence? Then find something you already have that gives you that feeling so you don’t have to wait for something in the future to bring it to you.

3. Gratitude . You have heard this before, but this is a critical step to attracting more of what you want into your life.

4. Trust. Be open to how and when your desire arrives. Know that there is a divine intelligence inside that knows exactly what you need for your highest good.

5. Don’t look at current circumstances as static. Everything in the universe is constantly growing and changing, just because you haven’t manifested what you want in this moment does not mean it is swiftly on its way to you right now.

Remember that the universe is more willing to give you want you want, than you are willing to receive it. We are all connected and your desires must be in alignment with the good of all. Let go and believe that your life is unfolding exactly as it should.

Author's Bio: 

Debra Berndt, Certified Clinical Hypnotherapist, Dating/Relationship Expert, Certified Hypnotic-Coach™, Radio Show Host, Author, Speaker, Dating Coach and creator of AttractLoveToday.com . Debra is the host of The Hypnotic Dating Show on the Real Coaching Radio network – visit Attractlovetoday.com to hear replays of the show. Her online self-hypnosis store is the fastest growing provider of self-hypnosis products. Debra has appeared internationally on radio and television promoting the power of the subconscious and self-hypnosis to attract true love.

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